Beware the Devil's Blend

Not everything on the list is write-home-about-it-funny, but here are a few of my favorites from You Know You Drink Too Much Coffee When...

• Juan Valdez named his donkey after you.
• You're the employee of the month at Starbucks and you don't even work there.
• Your T-shirt says, "Decaffeinated coffee is the devil's blend."
• You can jump-start your car without cables.
• You go to AA meetings just for the free coffee.
• Your birthday is a national holiday in Brazil.
• You can thread a sewing machine, while it's running.
• You help your dog chase its tail.