Tuesday, July 20, 2010

How To Find Jesus In An Emergency

Do you remember when the Worst-Case Survival Handbook was big and it was funny because, well, it kinda wasn't trying to be funny? Problem solved. With The OTHER Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook: A Parody it really IS supposed to be funny. Let's try a sample:

How to Find Jesus
Finding Jesus can be critically important in an emergency. The key is knowing where to look.

1. Don't Panic Many people, after realizing they have lost Jesus, become panicky. This can be very dangerous. Instead, take a few deep breaths, relax, and think: where was the last place you had Jesus? Go there.

2. Look Around Be thorough. Did you look behind the couch? He might be there. Don't just glance around the room, either. Lift things up. He might be in the clothing hamper, for instance. Check there. He's probably right where you left Him.

Tuesday 2/10/11 Update: Now on Kindle (10th Anniversary Edition with new content)! Order here or check out Gene's new page about it.


  1. Okay, I totally giggled. (Uh-oh. Does this mean I'm going to hell?)

  2. In my mind Jesus (and all other higher beings) have a tremendous sense of humor. How else can you be filled with light and joy? :)