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Monday, April 19, 2010

Flow, Ebb, Struggle, Repeat

Life works in cycles.
At least it does for me.
Over the course of the last few weeks I have been barraged, inundated, assaulted, buried, and deluged with an overabundance of....well...everything.
Some of that has been unquestionably good stuff like catching a standing room only concert of Green River Ordinance and Lifehouse, finding a gorgeous dress on sale, and singing with my son,our own lyrics to Michael Jackson songs in the car. But it also has involved unpleasant assorted varieties of dealing with disrespectful educators, mountains of work projects, and resisting the urge to throttle certain people who do not have the good sense to recognize the proper time for righteous indignation. (Get a spine! Take a stand! Stop reasoning away the unreasonable! If there's repeated evidence that requires a call to action, wait and see is the WRONG approach!)

Regardless of the 'goodness' or 'badness' of the busy-ness, it has left me drained. Big drained. I don't mean "Calgon-take-me-away" drained, I mean like "it's-a-good-thing-I-don't-have-a-heart-condition-because-I'd-be-done-for" drained.

I spent a few days trying to deny the drain. But, I recognized it lurking in the shadows. Then, it inched forward where I recognized it in my impatience. Rather than heed that warning, I found myself clinging to snarky remarks and hateful rapid fire response. Even though I wanted to be nice and I wanted to smooth things over, I kept roughing them up. It was as though I'd become possessed by a demon puppet-master and I had no choice but to be a bitch.

Definitely time for a de-compress. But how when that usually requires some sort of plan or activity? I didn't want activity and what I wanted even LESS was being glued to a computer as I had been for WEEKS. I usually enjoy the time, especially for writing.

I found myself totally dreading the idea of even LOOKING at my PC not even for writing. WRITING? Ugh. No plotting or wordsmithing or character development or stringing together coherent thoughts. Ick.

Thus, by the weekend, I decided to distance myself from my technological appendage. It was a lovely, much needed respite. I didn't do a lot. In fact, Sunday was dedicated to magazine-leafing, Netflix, and channel surfing. My brain got a reboot.

Now I find myself slightly more re-charged and ready to resume again...hopefully with a better attitude.

Back to flow.

1 comment:

  1. Thoughts that get stuck..,

    I just have a quick question for you but couldn't find an email so had to resort to this. I am a progressive blogger. Please email me back at barbaraobrien@maacenter.org when you get a chance. Thanks.

    Barbara

    ReplyDelete