The little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the way a bowling ball wouldn't. ~ Russell Beland, SpringfieldSee? That was almost precisely the same. The first one is a kid whose teacher thought his writing was horrid enough to submit to the website. The second is a famous, beloved science fiction writer. It's possible that young Russell was an Adams fan and his teacher just didn't get it. And maybe someone can enlighten us as to whether Adams himself had writing teachers who thought his writing was horrid. If so, well, I guess you can say he was laughing all the way to the bank...
The ships hovered in the air exactly as a brick wouldn't. ~ Douglas Adams
He spoke with the wisdom that can only come from experience, like a guy who went blind because he looked at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it and now goes around the country speaking at high schools about the dangers of looking at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it. ~ Joseph Romm, WashingtonJoseph's bit takes a while longer to get to the punchline, but you can see that the concept and construct is very similar in style. It makes me wonder if Wright's teachers never quite got his dry wit. I'm thinking no, most of them probably didn't.
Whenever I fill out an application and it says 'In case of an emergency notify...,' I put Doctor. What the hell is my mother gonna do? ~ Steven Wright
So bad analogies? No, I think most of these kids hit the rhythm of good humor. But hey, that's me. I make a statement like black type in the middle of a big white space.