I started blogging because it seemed like the cool thing to do and I hoped that I had something to say. I both continued and stalled because I started to feel pressure over making my posts 'good enough'. As though the title of my blog were "The Great American Novel" instead of "Thoughts That Get Stuck In My Head".
But today I'm unsettled and casting about for something to do with disquiet in my soul. It's the kind of day that when I was younger I would write letters to my best friend - my step-sister - because we were unlucky enough to live miles apart. (Yes, kids, this was back in the day before IMs and cell phones with unlimited plans and free long distance.) I was apparently very unsettled and disquieted because she has boxes of letters from those teen years. I also deluged Dwight Schultz with letters until I got an autographed picture. My letter writing became so significant over the summer of 1984 that I dubbed myself "The Great Letter Writing Bandit".
Well, now we have IM and cell phones with free long distance and I'm even lucky enough that my step-sis moved within 30 minutes of me. But at times I am still unsettled and casting about for something to do with disquiet in my soul. Yearning to reach out and communicate in an earnest and truthful way. A way that, to me, is only achieved by writing in full sentences and using clever turns of phrase that keep me entertained.
"Doh!" I said, slapping myself on the forehead. "THAT's what blogging is for!" Even now, as I'm typing this, I feel better. If I can use this forum to keep that monkey off my back - the overpowering need to communicate whether anyone likes it or not - then it will more than pay for itself. Wait a second, this is free....
The Great Letter Writing Bandit is IN.