Cheezy News Network

We need to come up with a new phrase that indicates when a cable news network has gone over the edge. When a sitcom collapses it is called "jumping the shark." When it's a classic movie series it is called "nuking the fridge" (something I would like to retroactively apply to Phantom Menace, by the way). And now with CNN coming up with shows like "Just Sayin'" and "What the..." (not to mention the cancer that is known as Lou Dobbs) we have to find a way write them off in pop cultural shorthand... in some way that is less lame than their own segment titles. Have they been taken over by 13 year olds? What's going on?

As background you should know that I was a huge fan of CNN when it started back in the early 80s. I loved Bernard Shaw's gravitas. I loved keeping up with international events. My only complaint was that eventually the news recycled because at ten years old I was happy to sit down and watch that channel all day long but when they started the cycle over again it harshed my curiosity.

It's possible that the classic purpose of CNN has become outdated - namely 24-hour NEWS. If people are really migrating to FoxNews and MSNBC then they don't want news they want opinion (specifically opinions that support their own and, you know, "An opinion should be the result of thought, not a substitute for it." ~Jef Mallett). It's like another era of yellow journalism. Pulitzer vs. Hearst has been replaced with Murdoch vs. well, I guess, Soros.

Infinite Monkey Theorem (or "What's the Deal with Twitter, Anyway?")

When it comes to technology these days it isn't just "have and have nots," there are also "do and do nots." When I mention something like Twitter the "do nots" usually ask, "What's the deal with Twitter, anyway?" They confide that they can't figure out what it is for or how it works or why anyone would want spend time on it anyway. This innocent and earnest confusion on their part has made me think more deeply about something that was previously just entertainment.

My conclusion is that Twitter is basically an enormous test of the Infinite Monkey Theorem. I mean, that's not what we each individually THINK we are doing. We are mostly amusing ourselves by posting stray thoughts and becoming a voyeur of other's stray thoughts. But with approximately six million monkeys pounding away at the keyboards - intersecting, overlapping, scaffolding, and weaving - we will sooner or later come up with the 21st century answer to Shakespeare. The question is whether we will recognize it when it happens. Because although we've built a machine of almost infinite potential, each tweeter has a very finite perspective.

You define your Twitter experience based on who you choose to "follow." Mine is defined by comedians, geeks, writers, and liberals. Basically I want to chuckle and see the thoughts of people who agree with me. It's like extending my friendship circle using my Blackberry and recent tweets often drop into my real life conversations. So although Jim Gaffigan didn't know it, he might as well have been standing in the coffee shop with us on Friday when he commented, "Biting into a chocolate chip cookie and realizing it's an oatmeal raisin cookie is kind of like finding out she's a dude."

Now that I'm done with this exploration of the tweetdom I'm going to tweet the link, which will display in the Twitter feed on my blog, thus creating a perfect circle and swallowing the universe. Sorry about that. For more info on Twitter, try checking out the Wiki entry.

King of Pop? Apparently More Like Pharaoh of Pop!

We've often speculated that Elvis escaped to the stars (or Route 66... same thing) but now we have proof that Michael Jackson escaped through time. It's good to know that he didn't die he just traveled back to Egypt to rule as an eternal Boy King. Go see the evidence in Chicago. (Pics and articles on NBC, the Telegraph, and Chicago Sun Times.)

Story via J. W. Ocker of O.T.I.S.

Update: amusing review by The Inquisitr.

Baby, It's Cold Outside (Shiver)

Tonight I had the privilege of attending Maggie Stiefvater's book launch party for "Shiver" in Williamsburg. Who is Maggie, you ask? Soon you will know because "Shiver" is expected to premier at #9 on the New York Times best seller list next week. It is a Young Adult (YA) novel with romance and werewolves. Yes, you read that right, romance and werewolves. From the two chapter reading that Maggie did tonight it promises to be even more enchanting than her previous books about homicidal fairies. (Yes, homicidal fairies. That series starts with the book "Lament.")

In person Maggie is delightfully enthusiastic and engaging, so this is definitely an author that I can recommend going out of your way to meet. She will be at Dragon Con if you are headed that way. Or you can check in at her blog for other appearances. We got the CD version to listen to on the way home so you will have to wait a few days for a full review. But the first two chapters were great.

Keep Doing What You've Done, Keep Getting What You've Got

It occurs to me, as I take the dogs out for the fifth time today (they get spoiled on weekends), that life has settled into a predictable and none too beloved pattern. Not that I have a bad life. But I'm more about impulse than routine, so having years go by with little variation is driving me oh-so-slightly crazy. And at this point I do have to look around and say, "Really? Is this all there is?" Because nothing is what I would have predicted and is all far, far less glamorous than I would have hoped. Not that I wanted to be a rock star or anything. Just something other than horrifyingly ordinary.

Must be time to shake things up...